maddie jane

: : : geek diaries : : :

welcome... this is bolander.net, a collection of musings, random thoughts, some pictures of me and my friends, and lots of my daughter, maddie, some links to favorite places on the 'net, and various sundry other things. have a look around, you might find something useful, or even interesting.

there isn't any rhyme or reason, this is a place for me to vent, post thoughts, comment on the mundane, quote verse, and sometimes share the very rare flashes of sheer, unadulterated genius. they can happen to anyone, even me.

: : : i'm a geek, get over it : : :

this site, and all pages, images, and content herein are (c) brian j. bolander. you may not link to nor use any image or content without prior written permission.
: : :   the archives   : : :



. . . today's the day

rose arrives in 7 hours, 24 minutes. can you say "excited"? thought so...


roses are red...


a little scared, a little nervous, and a whole lotta happy about this visit. the weather is most definitely not cooperating, but rain and fog will not stop me from being there, roses in hand, to greet the woman that i love when she steps off the plane. i don't think that anything can stop us...the only thing in life more important to me is maddie.

if you hadn't noticed, i've staked the rest of my life on this one. i cannot explain why, but she's like a forest fire burning out of control. the chips are in play, the dealing's done, and i'm all in. we'll see what the dealer is holding here in a bit.

so, don't look for updates for a few days, as she and i are going to re-acquaint ourselves one with another, and enjoy the peace and quiet that the next few days of our llives affords us.

i'll keep you posted - wish us well.




. . . merry christmas

so - another christmas away from home. even though i am there in heart and spirit, i wish with all my heart that i was there in the flesh. i'd give anything to be home.

i miss you all so much it hurts - especially maddie and rose. mom, dad, jenny, kelly, your families, tom, ash, dru, everyone. i hope this holiday is a good one.

everyone, know that i love you all, and will be home, safe and sound, in good time.

to all a very happy holiday season. my prayers are with you, my love goes out over the wires to you, and my heart is at home. all my love.




. . . follow me

moonlight on branches


when love beckons to you, follow him,
though his ways are hard and steep.
and when his wings enfold you yield to him,
though the sword hidden among his pinions
may wound you.
and when he speaks to you believe in him,
though his voice may shatter your dreams
as the north wind lays waste the garden.
for even as love crowns you
so shall he crucify you.
even as he is for your growth
so is he for your pruning.
even as he ascends to your height and caresses
your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
so shall he descend to your roots and
shake them in their clinging to the earth.

- kahlil gibran




. . . wise woman

river rocks


a wise woman who was traveling in the mountains found a precious stone in a stream.

the next day she met another traveler who was hungry, and the wise woman opened her bag to share her food. the hungry traveler saw the precious stone and asked the woman to give it to him. she did so without hesitation.

the traveler left, rejoicing in his good fortune. he knew the stone was worth enough to give him security for a lifetime. but a few days later he came back to return the stone to the wise woman.

"i've been thinking," he said, "i know how valuable the stone is, but i give it back in the hope that you can give me something even more precious. give me what you have within you that enabled you to give me the stone.




. . . the sound of silence

"The silly when deceived exclaim loudly; the fool complains; the honest man walks away and is silent."

- francois de la noue




. . . secret garden

azure blue

i've been struck by the muse again, and there are more haiku posted here. additionally, i came across a wonderful quote. more on that in a moment.

ah, to embrace my loved ones, their gentle laughter and loving glances, tender hands and warm smiles. the patter of little feet bare and dirty on the deck out back. i wait as patiently as an impatient man can, for time to pass, and i am home, and resting easy and carefree in the comfort and safety found there.

today's quote:

"when we were children we played together in the garden, and we believed the garden was eternal and our gates eternal too...one day the garden gate was locked...and behind the wall the flowers were dug up.

i have been so lonely for that garden and you came and casually you lifted up the latch and took me back inside. without even noticing you brought the flowers back to life. all that was lost you gave back to me. you called me out of the kingdom of death...and all the world was spring."

antonine de saint-exupery




. . . the stonecutter

stonecutter


there was once a stone cutter who was dissatisfied with himself and with his position in life.

one day he passed a wealthy merchant's house. through the open gateway, he saw many fine possessions and important visitors. "how powerful that merchant must be!" thought the stone cutter. he became very envious and wished that he could be like the merchant.

to his great surprise, he suddenly became the merchant, enjoying more luxuries and power than he had ever imagined, but envied and detested by those less wealthy than himself. soon a high official passed by, carried in a sedan chair, accompanied by attendants and escorted by soldiers beating gongs. everyone, no matter how wealthy, had to bow low before the procession. "how powerful that official is!" he thought. "i wish that i could be a high official!"

then he became the high official, carried everywhere in his embroidered sedan chair, feared and hated by the people all around. it was a hot summer day, so the official felt very uncomfortable in the sticky sedan chair. he looked up at the sun. it shone proudly in the sky, unaffected by his presence. "how powerful the sun is!" he thought. "i wish that i could be the sun!"

then he became the sun, shining fiercely down on everyone, scorching the fields, cursed by the farmers and laborers. but a huge black cloud moved between him and the earth, so that his light could no longer shine on everything below. "how powerful that storm cloud is!" he thought. "i wish that i could be a cloud!"

then he became the cloud, flooding the fields and villages, shouted at by everyone. but soon he found that he was being pushed away by some great force, and realized that it was the wind. "how powerful it is!" he thought. "i wish that i could be the wind!"

then he became the wind, blowing tiles off the roofs of houses, uprooting trees, feared and hated by all below him. but after a while, he ran up against something that would not move, no matter how forcefully he blew against it - a huge, towering rock. "how powerful that rock is!" he thought. "i wish that i could be a rock!"

then he became the rock, more powerful than anything else on earth. but as he stood there, he heard the sound of a hammer pounding a chisel into the hard surface, and felt himself being changed. "what could be more powerful than i, the rock?" he thought.

he looked down and saw far below him the figure of a stone cutter.



the moral? there are some who will see it immediately, some who will not. some will see what i see, some will see something different. what is it that you see?




. . . evening song

aphrodite

evening song

look off, dear love, across the sallow sands,
and mark yon meeting of the sun and sea;
how long they kiss in sight of all the lands,
ah! longer, longer we.

now, in the sea's red vintage melts the sun
as egypt's pearl dissolved in rosy wine
and cleopatra night drinks all. 'tis done,
love, lay thine hand in mine.

come forth, sweet stars, and comfort heaven's heart,
glimmer, ye waves, 'round else unlighted sands;
oh night! divorce our sun and sky apart
never our lips, our hands.

- sidney lanier




. . . give us this day

our daily bread. a friend (and a better one than i had ever imagined he'd be) sent me an e-mail today - here's some of it:

"i wish that i could be more like you. i wish that i had the widom and intelligence that you possess. i wish that i knew the things that you do. i wish that i could think like you think...during the past year, you have become more than just one of my best friends..."

wow. there was more, but i don't want to embarrass him, so i'll stop. i had no idea that i had that sort of affect on anyone, much less someone that i'm so close to.

you made my day, brother. thanks.




. . . passports and cd's and quotes, oh my

so - you need to renew a passport??? click here for all the info you could ever want...

additionally, i whipped up a little how-to on using nero to burn downloaded mp3's to a cd. one more loose end tied up.

here it is in .doc format, and here it is zipped up.

click the first link, then open it up...happy burning!

today's quote:

"...honor...was a virtue that all craved, even those who lacked it. fundamentally, honor itself was a debt, a code of behaviour, a promise, something inside yourself that you owed to the others who saw it in you...to look and see a person worthy of respect and trust, and honor."

- tom clancy, from "debt of honor"

to all those at home, i love you, i miss you, i'll be home sooner than any of us think.




. . . perfect example

alan jackson - drive


i managed to find yet another example of how a country song can fit life perfectly. this time it's an alan jackson song, off his latest album "drive".

it's twilight and the streetlights are coming on.
i'm in a stream of cars on this boulevard headed home.
i can hardly wait for you to make what went wrong today seem right.
it's been a long hard day, so bring on the night.

bring on the night,
and pull down the shades.
lock the world outside,
and throw the key away.
and turn on the feelings,
and turn out the lights.
lets call it a day,
and bring on the night.

from nine to five, it's the same old grind all week long,
and the only thing that keeps me sane is coming home.
when the sun goes down, you know how to set things right.
lets put the day behind us and bring on the night.

bring on the night,
and pull down the shades.
lock the world outside,
and throw the key away.
and turn on the feelings,
and turn out the lights.
lets call it a day,
and bring on the night.

lets call it a day,
and bring on the night.

listen - it might take a bit to download, be patient, please...

i miss you rose. all i want is to come home to maddie and you, and never be parted again.




. . . oh. my.

it's cold. so cold that the trailers aren't warm, the grass is frozen, the windows and cars frosty, the fingers with which i type this early morning update are stiff, and i'm going running in this? i must be insane.

mebbe a little - it only hurts for the first mile or so, the everything is so numb that i feel like a character from a jack london novel trying to survive the arctic winter...

how does 27 degrees farenheit grab yah? 5 below zero? i'm from california, this is nuts.

today's quote:

"love does not consist in gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction."

- antoine de saint-exupery




. . . my day, part two

so, i drive to venice, and find out that the guys i was supposed to pick up aren't there!!! nice to know before i took the trip (but it's a beautiful day, and the drive is a nice fast one, down the a28 to a4, then 2214 into venezia.

now, what else can go wrong? oh yeah! the atm machine ate my government travel card! now i have no way to buy food!

ain't life grand??? keep smiling, i am.




. . . un altro giorno senza voi

so, i woke up late this am, alarm clock issues, but made it to work on time...then left promptly for the track, and ran about 2.5 miles. it is so cold here before the sun comes up it's not even funny. but after about a mile, i couldn't feel my fingers, nose and ears any more, so it wasn't all bad.

i've got to go pick up the boss at marco polo today, and it'll be a light day for me. i'm glad the weekend is over, and there is actual work to do - it beats sitting around doing nada all day, thats for sure.

until next time, faithful reader...

today's quote:

"love one another and you will be happy. it's as simple and as difficult as that."

- michael leunig




. . . venezia

so, today, i drove the route to the venice airport. because i need to be able to get there and back again on my own - i'd have much rather napped all afternoon. i wrote a letter to mi novia, went to the post office, mailed it, then came to work (and it's such a pain, getting in and out when the cops aren't manning the gate) to give the folks at home an update.

week one down. ack - that means that i have 11 left? say it ain't so! i miss home like der teufel, and as much as i love my job over here, the people i work for, and europe in general, there is so much to look forward to when i get home that it's hard to think of much else.

my family, my friends, mio amore, i love you all. take care, until next time...

today's quote:

"i met in the street a very poor young man who was in love. his hat was old, his coat worn, his cloak was out at the elbows, the water passed through his shoes -- and the stars through his soul."

- victor hugo




. . . bad day

so. where you been? i've been here, and what a shite day it's been. managed to be the first on my rotation to dent up a vehicle (well, scratch, but you get the picture), and there's enough on my mind above and beyond the scratches in the bumper of the focus to more than stress me out.

i've gotten some more digital pics from a pal, and put them up on the images page. enjoy.




. . . the view from the ground

this is a recent picture of what this place looks like - it's beautiful...the snowline has marched up the mountain after the last few days of rain, but beyond it, the alps are still blanketed in white. gorgeous:

click for a larger image

nice, eh? i wish that you could be here to see it for yourself...all my love to those who are at home.




. . . wisdom of the ancients?

sometimes, you come across something so so simple yet profound you have to share - here's what i found:

aristotle and plato

"...love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies..."

- aristotle

pretty good, eh? i thought so...




. . . today's thought

gibran



"keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh and the greatness which does not bow before children."

- kahlil gibran




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