...will she know how much i loved her? i showed her every day, in each and every way, that she was my only one...

ever wonder about pain? i do. when it's numb, does it still hurt? kind of like the hypothetical tree falling down in that imaginary forest - if there's no-one to hear it fall, does it make any noise?

if no-one cares, does it hurt?

i can't seem to detect any real feeling in the deep dark places where my soul lived. i walk those halls, and my footsteps echo, empty, in the vast chambers once filled with light and life. if you've ever read tolkien, and remember the fellowship's descent into khazad-dûm, you have an inkling of the former glory i speak of.

i wonder, will i turn a corner and meet the balrog? or is he already dogging my heels, and i'm too numb to feel him breathing down my neck...

i was burglarized last week, and the bleepards took just about everything that was worth anything. no more dvd's, cd's, electronic equipment, cameras, jewelery, the vcr and the dvd player - you name it, if it was small and worth anything it's gone.

so, once more into the breach, i guess. thank the heavens that i have renter's insurance. i'm trying to come up with a list of all the stuff thats gone. the worst part is how i feel - violated. my home's not really my home any longer and its driving me nuts.

somebody stop the train. i want to get off.

man, i hope you see this. another year older, and hopefully this new one will be the best one yet. you and i have climbed the mountain (in more ways that one) and are better for it.

we've been through alot, both while at aviano and while back home, and i consider myself lucky to be your friend. happy birthday, you sheep-loving son of a whore... =o)

jenny and matt are parents again - welcome little one. may your days be long and your life be happy...

and a few less dollars. 12 years in the usaf , and i still exist. some months (this one included) barely.

on a lighter note, jenny and matthew had a new baby a few days back. no pictures yet, but i expect that they will be long shortly.

halloween was quiet - the highlight of the evening? maddie dressed up as cinderella. i'll get some pics up when i get them off my camera.