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10.27.03

. . . the more loving one

funny, seems so long since i've actually read anything, and today at work, i came across this by auden. i love this man's mind, the way he structures his work, and the way it reaches into me and tugs at things i've tried so hard to forget, or to kill.

i feel quite barren. there is no future in this. i'm lost, alone. don't make the same mistakes that i have made.

"looking up at the stars, i know quite well
that, for all they care, i can go to hell,
but on earth indifference is the least
we have to dread from man or beast.

how should we like it were stars to burn
with a passion for us we could not return?
if equal affection cannot be,
let the more loving one be me.

admirer as i think i am
of stars that do not give a damn,
i cannot, now i see them, say
i missed one terribly all day.

were all stars to disappear or die,
i should learn to look at an empty sky
and feel its total dark sublime,
though this might take me a little time."

- w. h. auden

tGo at 10:39 talk back ()


10.26.03

. . . maddie girl

i love her more than life, but this peeing in the bed thing in the middle of the night has got to stop...

tGo at 23:03 talk back ()


10.26.03

. . . still ill...


"under the iron bridge we kissed
and although i ended up with sore lips
it just wasn't like
the old days anymore
no it wasn't like those days
am i still ill?
am i still ill?"

- the smiths

tGo at 21:36 talk back ()


10.14.03

. . . on being normal

nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.

- albert camus, 1913-1960

tGo at 11:27 talk back ()



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